Attractive female teenagers offer to park men’s cars

by Lee Hopkins on September 21, 2006 · 2 comments

in Uncategorized

Pull up to the bumper, baby

Okay… here’s an idea both ‘seedy’ and highly profitable at the same time, seeing as we men are superior to women (on account of the well acknowledged fact that we have two brains. It is indeed unfortunate that we only have enough blood to run one at any one time…)

A very smart (or dumb, check your ideology in at the door) male entrepreneur in Californication figured that pretty young college women and starving would-be actresses/waitresses would be a nicer option to valet park your car than boring old teenage guys who go Beavis and Butthead over your 911.

Gosh, who would have thought that men would be dumb/relaxed enough to fall for it?

Next: the Better Desirable Roasted Communications Cafe Teenage Hotster-Girlie Valet Parking Franchise. Apply here

As the founders (since 1989) of the operation offer, Allan and I will offer to park your car dressed in chick and elegant dress (all black attire), tank tops, capri pants, camisoles (we may have to ask for help), mini skirts, bikinis and lingerie. I know that Allan and I have no problem bearing our midriff for anyone…

We will even let clients customise an outfit for their particular event. Noblesse oblige.

Allan and I may have a slight problem with one of the criteria for the ValetPark franchise — being a team of gracious, sexy and skilled women. According to reports from Mrs Desirable Roasted Coffee, Allan may not be as highly ‘sexy’ and ‘skilled’ as some 911-driving women might desire.

However, your humble correspondent in the Adelaide Hills is willing to ignore any personal discomfort to make sure that 911-driving and cashed-up women are treated as equally well as their male Californian colleagues would be. Again, noblesse oblige….

  • http://www.geocities.com/claren44/radio Clarence Jones

    [quote]Allan and I will offer to park your car dressed in chick and elegant dress (all black attire), tank tops, capri pants, camisoles (we may have to ask for help), mini skirts, bikinis and lingerie.[/quote]
    Wouldn’t that be a bit warm several months out of the year? You might rotate two off the list each evening: tank top & capris Thursdays, camisoles & minis Fridays, &, but of course, evening wear on Saturdays, with Sundays being clothing Optional.

    ohh, & a laRge faux diamond pin on the tank top, for that touch of Slumming Elegance…
    Love & Peace, Clarence
    btw, Charlton Heston & Yul Brynner in a Teen Comedy? See here:http://www.thetrailermash.com/10-things-i-hate-about-commandments-comedy/

  • http://www.geocities.com/claren44/radio Clarence Jones

    [quote]Allan and I will offer to park your car dressed in chick and elegant dress (all black attire), tank tops, capri pants, camisoles (we may have to ask for help), mini skirts, bikinis and lingerie.[/quote]
    Wouldn’t that be a bit warm several months out of the year? You might rotate two off the list each evening: tank top & capris Thursdays, camisoles & minis Fridays, &, but of course, evening wear on Saturdays, with Sundays being clothing Optional.

    ohh, & a laRge faux diamond pin on the tank top, for that touch of Slumming Elegance…
    Love & Peace, Clarence
    btw, Charlton Heston & Yul Brynner in a Teen Comedy? See here:http://www.thetrailermash.com/10-things-i-hate-about-commandments-comedy/

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